Release and Renewal

Release comes in many forms. I have been going through this process sometimes very confident and other times just all over the place.  I am the nurturing type especially with the men in my life.  I am always concerned about if they need anything be it love, conversation or just support in general. Sometimes it seems like I am pouring all of who I am into this sea of what is but I’ve never been sure if it’s really made a difference.  The ocean is so big so my cup of who I am seems so small in comparison, it hard to know if I’m making any waves or having any real impact. But today something different happened to my view. I randomly reached out to my brother.  We don’t talk every day sometimes we can go months without talking. It’s not because there is any reason, we are both just living life. He in his world and me in mine. So when we do talk it’s usually to catch up on what has happened since our last conversation. We both are somewhat private people and we’ve never been overly affectionate with each other. I’ve noticed in the last few years that our relationship has shifted and especially in the last six months. In a good way.  I’ve been able to share with him some of my spiritual experiences and he’s definitely been intrigued by it. So the first thing he asks is if I had gotten any messages for him. And I’m like no and I tell him a little bit about what has been happening and how some of my memory is coming back. ( If I hadn’t mentioned this before for some reason I can’t remember anything that happened between the age of 6-12. I literally blocked out a time period in my life).  So at the end of the conversation he says regardless as to what anyone thinks I believe you and I support you. And that statement made me feel very emotional.  It allowed me to let go of some of the things I’ve been trying to work through.  I felt a renewed since of acceptance and validation. His comment made me pause for a moment and it helped to restore my faith in men, family and in people in general.  I feel like I am going in the right direction and I feel a sense of peace.

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