Finding Meaning In Times of Uncertainty

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Fifteen days into self quartine and social distancing has a way of providing perspective. While I don’t claim to know everything, I do know what is happening all over the world at this moment in time, is causing everyone to take a look at life as they know it and make some decisions. Some of those decisions will be very personal while other decisions have become mandates such as working from home and in some cases temporary job loss.

Luckily I am a half glass full person, so I definitely wanted to put some positive vibes out especially after being surrounded by so many doomsday theories and just plain confusion about the state of our affairs not only in this country but all over the world. So in that vein, I’ll share some things that I am happy to see and proud to be a part of.

1 – Although I live hundreds of miles away from my parents and siblings, with all this free time we’ve been checking in on each other more frequently.  Some of the conversations are utterly ridiculous like the one I had with my father a week ago about this “worldwide academic’ (he means pandemic) and him arguing with me about the number of people in my area that are infected with the virus (70% of the city according to him).  I’m like dad, I check the news at least once a day and that’s just not the case because there aren’t enough test available to for that many people yet.  According to the 2017 census, there are over six million people in the metro DC area so his theory is just not possible. Or even the conversation with my brother whose every other word was obviously fear-based and also laced with rumors and misinformation.

The other extreme of conversations with my mother and sister are more lighthearted, lined with humor and memes about the times we are living in. My mother frequently reminding me of our need to keep the faith and watch the words we speak. I see now I get a lot of my perspective from both parents. For years my mother has reminded us about not speaking things into existence long before it became a thing for me. Although the language she used was different, the message has always been the same. My sister and I exchange daily memes and funny video clips that we find throughout the day, not once have I heard a negative word come out of her mouth since this whole thing began. So I’m grateful and feel more connected to the four of them than I have felt in a while.

I am also thankful for the reminder that I come from a family, a race and a culture where we have learned to laugh through the pain and confusion even when we have no idea of what is to come. I don’t know what happens next but I have an overwhelming feeling that all is well and things will fix themselves. I also have a feeling that this situation is opening the heart of the human spirit something we all so desperately need at this time.

2 – I’ve also gotten reacclimated to the power of sleep. The type of sleep that really allows the body to rest without the guilt often associated with inactivity.  I personally don’t feel guilty about getting adequate sleep but I know there are a lot of people who do. In the last six months, I’ve been working on a project that I’ve enjoyed overall but the last thirty days the hours increased drastically and I was working 10-12 hour days more than I care to admit. Not to mention other work-related obligations I had outside of that project that would consume my Saturday mornings. So I spent the last two weeks getting the best sleep of my life, mainly because I’ve exhausted tv, eating, reading, and chatting with family and friends.  I am now feeling inspired to get back to writing, blogging, and podcasting. All activities that make me happy and keep me feeling aligned with my inner being.

3 – I have this saying that “if you don’t slow down, then the universe will slow you down.”  Well, this time is proof that humanity needed to slow down and recalibrate so that we are positioned to operate in more aligned ways going forward.  I’m not a big news person but for years there has been talk of the damage human behavior has had on the planet, maybe this is a universe’s way of slowing if not stopping a lot of those behaviors so that the planet can heal itself. The few times I’ve been outside, there are very few vehicles on the road so I know our carbon imprint has shifted.  I’m sure companies that pollute have had to slow down operations as well. With most people indoors, the physical earth is definitely getting the rest it needs as well. Maybe when we emerge from this time, it will be with more kindness and empathy not only towards each other but toward the planet we all reside on.

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4 – People are exploring new ways to live in isolation. I’ve never seen so many virtual parties, open mics, and concerts than I am seeing right now. Last night I played tv show trivia on Instagram live followed by watching a mini-concert series, both of which I enjoyed. It gave me a much needed Netflix break. People are become creative and expanding the reality of what is possible. It shows the depth of human connection and taps into the spirit of our ability to adjust accordingly.

The first fifteen days I had mixed feelings, but going into the third week of quarantine I feel more at peace and much more emotionally stabilized about the current situation. I’ve stopped running to the grocery store every day. I was only going to refill on snacks anyway. I’ve started to fall into a routine. I am staying very connected with my family and friends. I go out for a nice walk as often as the weather will permit. I am also enjoying the creativity being displayed by others as well as the awakening of our heart center. Stay safe and stay blessed!

 

The Path of Least Resistance

I had a big ah-ha moment while listening to Abraham Hicks this weekend.  As I’ve mentioned before, I moved from Atlanta to DC about 15 months ago. While I’ve had some positive moments my overall experience in DC has been pretty trash, to say the least. There were very specific things that I wanted to create and manifest here. Beyond that, I also wanted to continue the flow of things that were going really well for me in Atlanta which included my accounting and yoga business.

I still feel that the move to DC was in alignment with my purpose. However, when my plan didn’t go according to plan, I got stuck in a little loop that has had me feeling out of sync, unmotivated and unhappy the majority of my time here. To put this in perspective keep in mind that the last 4-5 years have been overwhelmingly positive, aligned and happiest I’ve been in all of my life. I’m human so I’ve had negative moments in that time span but the positive far outweighed the negative. So the transition from being really happy to being unhappy for this length of time has been a bit of a struggle.

I think we all know when we are out of alignment. It feels different for different people and for most people it’s hard to describe. We know what feelings we want to have and we also know what we are feeling is not what we want. I know I feel most in alignment when I feel creative and when I’m doing things I love to do such as writing, dancing, yoga, exploring a new interest, being social and traveling. I have had no desire to do any of these things consistently since I got here. More importantly, I’ve been aware of it but haven’t been able to sustain enough “light at the end of the tunnel” vibes to propel myself to the other side of these feelings until the tantrum. The moment I admitted defeat and threw in the towel my mood changed.

I’m not really a person that likes to throw in the towel so I’ve been telling myself things are going to get better and work themselves out but the signs have been a bit scattered. So much so that I had an adult tantrum about a week ago. Yes, I can admit that I was on some ‘I hate this place, why am I still here (in DC)’. The previous day I’d ordered a winter coat and a few weeks prior to a couch but at the end of the tantrum, I was like I’m canceling everything F#@% this city. I can laugh at it now but I was so serious at the moment. Then I proceeded to tell anyone who would listen. I needed to vent and drum up some sympathy for my plight. After two days, I was somewhat back to normal and calm enough to reflect. I decided that I was too old to be unhappy and if this place was the source of my unhappiness then I could just move. I also came to the conclusion that as an adult, there are only two things that can possibly keep us unhappy. The first being feeling like we are stuck and not knowing how to get unstuck. The second is making the chose to be unhappy which is pretty normal as well. It’s unrealistic to think that you can be happy and positive 100% of the time for the rest of your life.  I think you can get really close to it with effort and understanding but I don’t think it’s abnormal either we are not. I was clearly choosing to be unhappy and it was somehow serving a purpose otherwise I wouldn’t still be entertaining it. I had to admit that this place wasn’t working and that it was ok to make another decision. I had to take my own advice. At the end of this conversation with myself, I felt a weight lift off my shoulders and mood changed instantly.

Of course, moving takes planning so I am satisfied knowing I have a solution and feel like I’m back in the driver’s seat. I also had to admit that my negative feelings about this place have kept me from creating and manifesting. The law of attraction always presents what you focus on, so the more I focused on the negative the more those things became a self-fulfilling prophecy pushing me further away from what I intended to create while being here. I couldn’t stay focused long enough on the positive to keep a path open for opportunities to flow consistently.  In the midst of all my mindset struggles, two good things have happened in DC that I had to acknowledge after this tantrum. I have found spaces (apartments) that I love. I am also on a project with people I like and enjoy being around. However, I couldn’t focus my silver linings because I was too focused on the negative.

In the midst of all of this when I randomly stumbled across Abraham Hicks 3 Things You Can Practice Every Day To Accelerate Your Progress, I knew it was a sign and confirmation. It summed up the last 15 months but also provided some guidance that we all can use about finding the path of least resistance.

1 – To find the path of least resistance which is available to all of us, we have to slow down long enough to let it find us. The best way to do this through meditation. Quieting the mind, allows your vibration to rise. While in a meditative state you are able to tune into your higher self which provides not only a solution but a path to least resistance. Clearly the last 15 months of my life have been full of resistance. I could tell based on my mood (unhappy and complaining), my state of mind (feeling out of sync and unmotivated) and the experiences (rude people, bad weather, etc) have been present.

2 – Next which is the hardest, do not try to solve the problem when negative emotions get stuck in your vibration, it only compounds the problem. Instead, it is suggested that you acknowledge it, admit you were wrong, let it go, put in a new request and relax long enough for the solution to reveal itself. Easier said than done it’s taken me 15 months to get here stop replaying the mental tape on why things haven’t gone according to plan. Even though it was a good plan, it just hasn’t worked here so I had to release it which I did a week ago. Hopefully, it won’t take you as long to get to the resolution.

3 – Last but not least if you already have made a plan, put in a new request, then give it time to fix itself. One can never tune into positive vibrations by living in a mind state of negative emotions. The silver lining was hearing that negative emotions are a part of the process and in truth can’t be avoided. It’s human. What we do have control over is how long we live in our state of negative emotions. That clearly determines how long we will be out of alignment. I’ve put in my new request so I’m optimistic and excited as I wait for my path of least resistance to appear.

Happy holidays and thanks for rocking with me for another year. Peace and Blessings.

 

Pursuit of Alignment Podcast

It’s been a minute but I’ve been busy trying to get in alignment with my purpose. To get in alignment means I had to be out of alignment and I was for awhile. I struggled quite a bit with this move to DC. I have finally found my footing and I’m ready to dive deep into this chapter of my life. While trying to figure it out I launched the Pursuit of Alignment Podcast. Pursuit of Alignment is about finding one’s life purpose and the journey to balancing and integrating that purpose into your life according to one’s own terms. I am ten episodes in and it has been an amazing experience. The podcast is pretty much this blog on audio but I also get to bring in some amazing people to share their journey and perspective on getting in alignment with their purpose.

What I love so far

I love to observe people and have been doing it for years. People, their journey and perspectives have always been interesting to me. When I people watch, I create narratives about each person’s life. I imagine what their conversations are about, how they act in real life, where they live if they have kids, what’s their profession and even their personality type all from watching their mannerisms. So podcasting satisfies my need to hear the narratives I’ve been making up in my head.

So far my guest by pure coincidence have been not only intuitive but also spiritual. Meaning their experiences and core beliefs have lead them to a higher or a different understanding of who we are and why we are here. My first guest Kelli (episode #004 & #005) learned at 10 years old about her gifts. It would be years later before she accepted her calling of being a Spiritual Life Coach. Jordana (episode #006) talks about how intuition and spirituality was a part of her home. So she learned from an early age to trust her intuition. After reading the section on PR in a career book, she instinctively knew that’s the career she should pursue. With no experience or background in that industry, she fearlessly applied for and landed a PR Director role at an agency.

Simla (episode #007) shares how she found her purpose after having two major brain surgeries back in 2007. She shares how her whole perspective change and she walked away feeling born again and that she was had a purpose. This lead to her creating the concept of empowerment tourism where she now combines tourism and sustainable impact on the communities she travels to. Kiana (episode #008) knew intuitively from a young age that she would serve in the medical field, the delivery of her first child solidified in what capacity. She shares that your growth will come from being uncomfortable and you don’t always have to change professions to find it. Sasha (episode #009) shares why she dubbs herself a Productive Dreamer and shares how her gifts and passions are all a part of her purpose.

I round out the 10th episode, by sharing my struggles with falling in and out of alignment with my purpose. I also offer some tools on how to get back in alignment and to keep going. This episode is proof that every day I’m still trying to figure it out like everyone else. To listen to any of the episodes listed above, visit Pursuit of Alignment Podcast.

Be blessed!

East Coasting

I am eight months into this Washington DC adventure. WE are family so I am going to be completely transparent. The first four months were tough and I was MISERABLE!!!!! I am rarely miserable so when I am, it feels like the end of the world. I mean who moves from Atlanta right before the winter. I promise you it made perfect sense at the time but the cold weather and snow was messing with my psyche… add in that everything just came to a standstill and not in a good way. So that just added to my disappointment.  Then I got sick and my eyes were bothering me. I kept trying to get into a routine because I know a routine stabalizes my mood but I was having no luck.

I eventually stumbled across two books that changed the game for me “Prosperity Bible” and “Money and the Law of Attraction”.  If you don’t feel motivated after reading those, then I don’t know what will motivate you. There were days when I would read for 6 hours straight, go to yoga, come home and get back in the bed. In February, I started to feel better.  I am now fully back to being my random self and surprisingly extremely happy. I mean happy like that coworker who comes in yelling ‘good morning’ while you roll your eyes because you know nobody could be that damn happy on a Monday. So yep I am happy like her.  I wake up smiling because the east coast tides have changed for your girl.  I am going to act like the first four months didn’t happen and I’ll share with you what I’ve been up to since February.

Podcast

While I love blogging, I don’t always have time to do it.  So in the fall, I decided to start a podcast. I was amped up about it until I went into my funk. Now I am back at it and launching this week.  This podcast, of course, will be a compilation of where I am in life.  I will share my spiritual experiences, along with tools that led to finding my purpose. The only difference is now you get to hear my voice and the voice of my amazing guest.

Business

My yoga business, I pushed it to the side but it keeps calling me. So I am going to attempt to do what other entrepreneurs have said is impossible, I am going to run two business simultaneously. Which I’ve been kind of doing anyway because I love them both equally and in truth, they kind of move on separate cycles.  I didn’t think I would love having an accounting business but I got my first DC client a month ago and I just love her. She is the ultimate client. She sees me as her advisor and I really feel like I am able to make an impact. I am looking forward to being the financial pulse of her nonprofit organization.

Mentoring

I am also back in mentor mode.  Young people are entertaining and I love their energy so volunteered to be a student liaison at the University of Maryland.  These are college students so of course, they know everything and they spend quite a bit of time ignoring my email. I am working on building trust with them.  That’s my project for the year, to connect with these 20-year-olds and help make their transition into the real world a little easier than it was for me. I didn’t have enough sense back then to know I needed a mentor.  I actually was probably not the idea mentee up until about 2018 so I get it. Whenever someone suggested I get a mentor, I’d roll my eyes and wonder how could a mentor really add value.  So I am attempting to build a bridge for them that I didn’t build for myself when I was that age.

Travel

I canceled my trip to South Africa but I don’t regret it. I was supposed to go in February but as I said around that time things weren’t going as planned so I sadly canceled my ticket. Which was probably for the best because it’s hard to enjoy a place when you are in a bad mood. The motherland is still in my sights and with luck, I shall grace her presence within the next 12 months.

Dating

I am rolling my eyes as I am typing this.  I decided in addition to getting out the house,  I also would get back on a dating app. It only took about two weeks before I posted in my profile “don’t ask me about my vagina”.  Maybe I should create an app called “don’t ask me about my vagina”.   I know apps are all about hooking up but damn can you pretend to get to know me first.  That is literally one of my biggest pet peeves besides being sent unsolicited pictures of men’s male parts.  We are human so its a given that if we are vibing and I’m into you, it will most likely go that way. Asking me two conversations in is a turn off. Does anybody in this generation have any patience any more??? I will dedicate a whole post to dating in the nation’s capital so stay tuned.

Peace and Blessings

 

 

Keep Leaping Into The Unknown

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I can’t believe we are already five months into 2019. I came into 2019 with some really big ideas but execution got off to a slow start. I kept getting stuck at how.  How is this going to happen? How am I going to do this by myself? Why don’t I  have any concrete answers? When you have big ideas the ‘what’ comes pretty easily but the ‘how’ is trickier. My inner critic was testing my spiritual gangster as usual. I was stuck there for a few months. Procrastination was impacting my life. Inaction was masking the fear I was feeling.

I’ve uprooted my life on a whelm and made all these promises (to myself) that I was no longer sure I could fulfill. Classic feelings of imposter syndrome crept into my life, threatening my independence. I knew how to create this new life in my mind but getting it to play out in my reality is a whole other ball game. We are five months in and I still haven’t figured out the how. What I did figure out is that I just needed to relax. When in doubt relax. We always have two choices. We can get to the finish line calm and relaxed or with our wig flipped inside out and one shoe on.

Here are some suggestions for getting to the finish line with peace in one piece.

Enjoy the journey and get out of your head. I have a high achiever mentality, I can’t help it. I always feel like I could be doing more. Although I never feel like I am in competition with others, I am always on a journey to reach a little higher or explore a different avenue. I was talking to my friend’s mom and she lovingly said but you have accomplished so much. She went to list off my accomplishments. I was stuck because she was right and at that moment I was being ungrateful. So I checked myself and thanked her for that reflection.

Give yourself some grace. If you are doing your best, you will accomplish the goals you set for yourself.  So be kind to yourself in the meantime. It’s easy to give others grace but we need to turn that magic wand on ourselves sometimes.

Look at your history.  Once we accomplish something we forget and move on to the next thing. That’s just the nature of being human. We were born to desire, desire is what leads to experience and expression. However, if you move on to the next thing too quickly you can’t pull from that experience. I love writing out my lessons learned because it gives me a moment to see how I have applied what life is teaching me. My overriding themes seem to be connected to forgiveness, releasing fear, trusting the unknown, opening my heart more and teaching others.  If you think about it, all those themes are related and I talk about these areas a lot. The truth is when you do not learn from your experiences, you will repeat it. Think about the one person who has the same complaint. Unless they are working on resolving that complaint, it will be the same complaint twenty years from now. So take a moment and look at your history and decide if your life is on repeat or if it’s evolving.

Peace and Blessing

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Is Your Spirituality Suffering Because of Your Busyness

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By Sarah Roberts, Guest Contributor

Do you always feel like you have too much on your plate, too many tasks to do and not enough time to get to everything? With the modern pace of life we are all busy, but it is also possible to be busy without letting our spiritual selves suffer.


Whatever spiritual journey you are on, just li
ke every other journey (weight loss, a new course of study, starting a new business) it doesn’t just happen, but requires time and effort. It is easier to find the time you need if you structure your life in such a way that prioritises your spiritual journey. This isn’t a crash diet, just like a fitness journey, you need to change your lifestyle and your habits to integrate the things that you need to do.


Once you have decided that nurturing yourself and pursuing your spiritual journey is a priority in your life, now begins the task of finding the time you need. Here are some ideas for
 opening up space for your spiritual journey in your busy life.


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Start your day with intention

Do something at the start of your day to make a connection with your spiritual practice. This doesn’t mean waking up at 4am to squeeze in 2 hours of meditation before the normal alarm time. You can start by simply taking 5 minutes to think about your spiritual priorities and what is important to you. This helps keep them in the front of your mind for the day.


Be honest about how you spend your time

Take an honest and brutal look at how you spend your time and be honest with yourself about here there is space. How will your life be improved if you manage to finish that Netflix series this week as opposed to if you devote that time to your spiritual journey? How much time are you spending flicking through Instagram and Facebook at night before going to bed? Is this having a negative impact on your mood and self-image and how could this time better be spent. We all have things like this in our lives that we could cut back on to make space for the things that are important.

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Multitask

Washing the dishes, or doing the laundry, automatic tasks that don’t require you to think? Use this time to contemplate your spiritual challenges. Psychologists suggest that we do some of our most profound thinking when we are occupied with tasks that we can do on ‘autopilot’ as the task-oriented parts of our brain are occupied with doing, the creative parts of our brain can come to the fore. This is why many people report having their best ideas when they are driving.


Also use your time in the car or walking. You
 probably don’t want to embark on a deep spiritual meditation while behind the wheel, but you can listen to relevant audiobooks or podcasts that feed your soul.


Use interruptions

Sometimes our schedule suffers interruptions that we cannot control. We have to wait 45 minutes for our doctor’s appointment. Our train is unexpectedly cancelled or delayed. Rather than getting frustrated, think of these as unexpected opportunities to focus on yourself and your spiritual journey.

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Set yourself small, achievable goals

Often, we fail at things because we come up with a grand goal, and our progress towards it is so slow that we lose motivation. Or we set ourselves challenges that are too great – such as aiming to meditate for an hour a day when you don’t feel like you even have 5 minutes to yourself. While you may have some ultimate grand goal, daily set yourself small, achievable goals. Meditate for just 5 minutes if you are starting out. Write just half a page in your journal. Find one new reading such as mindfulness and calming books that are relevant to your goal.


While these actions may seem small and insufficient for us to reach the vision of a spiritual life that we have for ourselves, remember that they are just a starting point. For example, once you start meditating and see its benefits and start to enjoy it, your will be amazed how you manage to find more time for it as it becomes more important to you.

Lines of Vision

As I shared a few months ago, I relocated from Atlanta to Washington DC in September. After spending half of 2018 feeling drained and out of sync, I finally made a spiritually prompted decision. My first month I focused on unpacking and relaxing. I spent most of November traveling. In my mind, I’d be ready to jump into this DC thing ie networking, finding clients and enjoying the city in December. Unfortunately, those aspirations were temporarily put on hold because of a little eye inflammation.

 

I can, in all honesty, admit that I didn’t take the best care of myself while I was traveling. My goal was to travel with one carry-on which meant quite a few things could not fit in my bag. I struggled the whole time with the six to seven hour time difference. I definitely wasn’t drinking my usual amounts of water and I only ate about once a day. I had an amazing time but I knew I was so out of sync the entire time.

After three weeks of traveling, I returned to the US with a cold and this inflammation. The cold left quickly but the inflammation has lingered on for two weeks. I have been a contact wearer most of my life and have had my share of irritations when it comes to my eyes but this by far has been the most eye-opening (no pun intended). Imagine walking around with blurred vision for two weeks. I was advised to stop wearing contacts and that it might take up to a month for it to fix itself. I generally can’t see far away anyway but this caused me not to be able to see up close either. I couldn’t drive, read, watch tv or enjoy any of the luxuries connected with full eyesight. In retrospect, I believe the more I tried to see, it only extended my spiritual time out. My body communicates with me in ‘mystical’ ways and when I miss the smaller messages it eventually leads to being pushed into resting and reflecting. About three days ago I finally surrendered to the message. I started focusing on just listening and not trying to use my sight. I had to then take stock of what was the bigger lesson.

In my everyday life, I am a business owner but I am not the best business owner yet. That’s not taking a shot at myself, it’s an honest assessment with the precursor that I am still doing my best with what I know. I am also open to becoming better. It’s just like anything else if something is new, you have to work at it to be great. So part of my assignment in relocating is to create a mission, vision and core values for my business. Although I incorporated almost two years ago, I never laid the foundation of who am I, who do I serve and how. Now that I’m ready to grow and expand, I’m truly not attuned to what the hell I’m growing and expanding. I know I am not alone in doing this, often we rush out into ‘doing’ without considering what foundation needs to be laid. Then we wonder why we are stagnant, why our career isn’t satisfying, why our relationships are failing, or why we feel like something is missing. It’s because we never stopped to think about an intention, a vision or an end goal. We ask for a relationship but don’t visualize it succeeding or attune to if its the right person. We ask for a promotion but rarely prepare for the responsibilities. On a surface level, I wanted to make money but that idea provides no direction or roadmap towards my true intention.

I think so often we want to get to the fun part and miss key points. On a spiritual level, I feel like my temporary loss of eyesight is in direct correlation with not having a vision for my life. Yesterday I meditated and documented my personal mission, vision, and set of core beliefs. I was so geeked because now I have a baseline to start from. All these things existed within me but I never pulled them to the surface. Yesterday was also the first day my right eye’s vision came in sharply. It was probably about twelve hours later but I’m sure as hell giving my guides and inner self credit for it. My point is until we get very clear and intentional, we won’t have an accurate picture of what we are doing or creating. Once we are clear, everything else opens up.

Peace and Blessings

Eros

Eros is the desire to make love. It is the creative force that seeks to express love through relationship, art, poetry, music, prayers of devotion, and songs of worshipful silence. Eros articulates love. In fact, creative love is art—it is the aspect of love that lends shape to the unformed inspiration of our inner life. Eros is love Incarnate. ~ Finding God In The Body, Benjamin Riggs

DC Entrepreneur Vibes

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I am three weeks into my staycation. A staycation is a vacation where you get to unplug from your traditional day to day task while staying in the comfort of your own home.  I don’t know if you can really call it a staycation because I recently relocated from Atlanta to Washington DC.  I am not sure if this is a permanent move but what I am sure that this part of my journey is tied to this location. I lived DC over ten years ago. The crazy thing is that both the city and I have changed drastically since then.  Ten years ago the city was more “urban” but gentrification has altered the landscape. This is not a bad thing, it actually makes the figuring it out part more interesting.

 

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The vibe of the city is also completely different from Atlanta.  Atlanta’s entrepreneurship experience for me was more focused on empowerment, starting a business and marketing yourself.  DC’s entrepreneur vibe is totally different.  The entrepreneurial vibe is more real estate investing, government and politically focused. Rightfully so because the government runs this town and “fighting the power’ (i.e. establishment) is very ingrained into it.  I am reminded of this everytime I’m trolling for things to do. I’m not gone lie, I am itching to march on Washington for some cause. I just haven’t figured out which cause.

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As I’ve been getting acquainted with the landscape and entrepreneurial vibe, it’s taking more time to get used to the question ‘so what do you do.’  It’s not so much the question but more of the tone that’s not sitting well with my spirit these days.  As if my response will determine my worthiness. I know my projections and insecurities are mixed into my perception.  I’m still kind of taken aback and annoyed by the tone.  It’s so direct and finite. I want to shrug and scream ‘I don’t know what I do. I’m figuring it out and taking it day by day.’  Although it’s a partially true statement, I am not sure if it’s appropriate for someone my age. The expectation is that I should know but the truth is I’ve chosen freedom and happiness over accuracy.  I am a CPA that blogs about my life and spiritual experiences.  I am also a yoga teacher that writes and aspires to speak publicly about doing what the hell you want.  I am also an entrepreneur that host events on quitting your job to follow your dreams.  I am also a landlord that travels. I am also on my ‘I support everybody black’ shit but I’m kind to people of all ethnicities.  I am also an aspiring podcaster that loves all these things equally…. so that’s the true response. I’m sure that’s confusing to some, that as a human being I have a multitude of interest that all tie into my purpose and life choices. I am taking it day by day and following what makes me happy but that tone temporarily has me stuck in my head about how to respond authentically.

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I also noticed while southern entrepreneurs believe in massaging you into doing business, DC entrepreneurs have a rude undertone. They aren’t paying attention to social cues. They want an immediate return on investment. They meet you today and want you to buy yesterday.  I’m like wait a minute so you not gone even pull out the vasoline before you make me bend over?  I’m not a southern belle.  I’m actually pretty ratchet but even I feel some kind of way about how I’ve been approached.  I’m probably being dramatic but I think you get where I’m going with that. I am also certain that I just haven’t met my tribe of entrepreneurs. They exist its just a matter of allowing things to happen.  I understand this is a new ball game, with key players and a system in place.  All in all this relocation and these new challenges are a source of adventure for me.  My adrenaline is pumping!  I love to use the puzzle analogy because it’s an accurate depiction of how I see life.  I am working on a new puzzle, it looks nothing like the old one.  I’ll start with the strategies I know and update them as needed. I am up for the challenge.

 

Peace and Blessings

 

African In America

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I’ve often steered clear of the slavery topic as an adult.  Especially in recent years with the resurgence of slavery movies. I watched enough of them in my youth to get it. I am in no way minimizing history, the experience, or its impacts.  However, I often felt this resurgence was just another hidden way to revictimize people of color and reinforce ideas of oppression.

As an African America, I also felt like that wasn’t our only history.  Slavery is a small drop in a bucket of history that should span back hundreds of thousands of years. In anticipation of my journeys to Africa and ancestry results, I am having to confront or at least make peace with slavery and the slave trade that took millions of African to other countries without their consent.  When I hear other cultures speak of their entry into this country it was by choice. They left their birthplace in search of better opportunities and/or living conditions. I feel like part of the misunderstanding of the Africa experience in America is related to the residue of being taken without choice and being forced into an oppressive system where you are seen as inferior. Although slavery in America ended on paper in 1865, it’s remnants are far from erased from the memories of Africa descendants born into this country.

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From a spiritual standpoint there are no mistakes and somewhere in the universe people of color chose their mission.  If there is an all-knowing presence and each person is sent to earth with a mission and purpose, then those two have to be connected to the color of our skin at least on a spiritual level.

Fear and programming have kept masses of Africans in place in order to perpetuate the ultimate betrayal of mind, body, and spirit. This betrayal cannot be ignored and still takes place on a daily basis. There is a karmic impact created by all choices. Each party has its role and I am sure that the ultimate sacrifice of being oppressed must be leading somewhere. Although I never feel spiritually bound by theses ideas, its hard not to be impacted by the heaviness of what you see and hear in this realm. In all cultures there seems to be a sacrificial lamb. A part that endures more suffering at the expense of others. The various spiritual text I’ve read confirms this.

If the goal is to bring in more love, light and understanding then that can only be done after atrocities of humanity take place. I don’t think you can understand universal love without taking a peek at its opposition.  Despite how it looks, in my spirit, I feel a shifting of the tides. This shift will be lead by love and compassion. I’m ready to make peace with the past and move toward an idea of oneness.

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Love and Light.